Non verbal communication

Non-verbal Communication
In a very general sense, non-verbal communication simply includes all communication which is not achieved purely through the use of words or other symbols which perform the same task as words. However, as discussed below under Non-verbal Terms, that distinction is not always clear cut.
Regardless of the occasional demarcation disputes, non-verbal communication occurs within the same basic framework (i.e. output, transmission and input, to condense thousands of pages into three words) as does communication which is dependent on discrete symbols such as words. As I mentioned earlier, that process is very briefly discussed in Appendix 1. Incidentally, I am still avoiding the term "verbal communication", because it is sometimes applied to the spoken word alone, and sometimes to both the spoken word and the written word.
Now, although we might assume that words provide most of the information we exchange, careful observation of people who are communicating reveals a veritable flood of non-verbal information. This may be exchanged at the same time as the verbal information. Alternatively, it may be the whole of the information in cases where no verbal component is present.
Distance
The distance between you and another person may affect the reception of directly transmitted information by the receiver s inputs. For example, if you are too far apart, you may not be able to hear each other s speech clearly. The other inputs can also be affected by distance, in similar ways.
Your position relative to a client also sends quite a few messages of its own. Talking to a patient who is in bed, from the corridor, may be interpreted to mean that normal proximity is not desirable. Any number of possible reasons could be imagined for this, such as that the communication is considered unimportant, the patient is thought to be infectious, or the prognosis is so terrible that you cannot bear to face them. Any unusually distant position could have a similar effect.
While excessive distance usually has an adverse influence, close proximity may have positive or negative effects. It might suggest friendliness, preparation for a confidential discussion or the natural behaviour of a warm and caring personality. On the other hand, it might seem threatening, or even downright offensive, depending on the situation and the person involved.
Orientation
Distance is not the only aspect of the spatial relationship between people. For example, standing above a person who is sitting or lying down may interfere with recognition of facial and ocular expressions and gestures, and may also make the person feel at a disadvantage in various ways. Sitting in a low chair beside someone in a high bed creates a more or less opposite vertical displacement, with its own set of drawbacks.
Even when two people are at the same vertical level, their orientation can vary greatly. The main possibilities are face to face, side to side, back to back and all the angles in between. In most situations, having at least an oblique view of the other person s face is highly desirable. Approximately face to face orientation has advantages, as all aspects of both verbal and non-verbal communication are then easier to exchange.
However, face to face orientation can seem confrontational, especially if the distance between the two people is small, so an oblique angle may be preferred. When a desk is present, one solution is for the client to sit beside one end of the desk, instead of facing the interviewer across the whole desktop. The two then view each other across a corner of the desk.
Posture
The posture of the body is in some ways analogous to the expression of the face, and provides communicative output in a similar way. Sometimes, an unusual posture may be due to physical or mental illness, but usually it can be controlled consciously, with consequent improvement in communication.
Consider the following possible postures. Standing rigid and immobile; crouching, poised as if ready to escape; slumped in a chair waiting for backache to strike; squatting uncomfortably on the floor and wobbling precariously; or sitting comfortably in a position which allows both relaxation and balance.
Movements
I will consider large-scale movements, and the body positions they create, under this heading. I will look at the movements called gestures under the next heading, and facial movements after that. They are all movements, of course. However, I think it will be more convenient to discuss them separately.
Visual communicators probably notice movements more than other communicators do. However, tactile communicators may not be far behind, especially in cases where the movement suggests the possibility of contact, or perhaps evokes some aspect of bodily comfort. Auditory and verbal communicators are likely to pay least attention to movements (unless they have good visual or tactile communication skills as well).
Moving closer might suggest interest, concern, affection, aggression, deafness or many other things, depending partly on the context and partly on the receiver. Moving away might suggest a lack of interest in the conversation, an uncaring attitude, fear, dislike, shock, disapproval, considerately allowing the other person more space – or various other things.
Crossed arms might convey a superior attitude, a closed mind, disapproval, defensiveness, or perhaps just a comfortable position. Immobility might convey a lack of interest, falling asleep, or perhaps very close attention to the other person.
Touching one s own face during a conversation is often taken to mean that one is either lying or withholding information. However, it could just as easily be an attempt to hide part of the face because of shyness. For that matter, it could be due to an itch, an attempt to stifle a sneeze (or a yawn) or perhaps just a self conscious check on a previously noticed blemish.
Another action – actually a deferring of action – which is sometimes taken as a sign of a dishonest answer is a pause before answering. I suppose this could just as well be classified as a Sound Effect, because it affects the rhythm of the auditory component of communication.
Anyway, the idea is that it takes time to formulate a good lie, whereas the truth is immediately available. The problem with this theory is that it can also take time to review the question and consider all the facts relevant to a good answer. Consequently, honest people might also pause before answering – and indeed, in my experience, they often do.
Some movements, and the consequent changes of position, cannot be avoided without sitting like a statue (which would send its own message). They therefore form an unavoidable non-verbal background to face to face communication. Consequently, it is important to pay attention to them.
Sometimes, paying attention to your own body language will allow you to catch inappropriate movements of your own before they even occur. For example, if a client shares something with you, which you find distressing or disgusting, you may notice some warning signs before you actually react.
Gestures
Gestures are, as mentioned above, a subset of movements, and a very important one at that. As also mentioned earlier, there are two main groups of gestures – the explicit ones, with specific meanings, and the rest, with relatively vague meanings. I have included both types under this heading.
It is important to remember that even the first group can never be trusted completely, as regards meaning, because the meanings of gestures are learned in a haphazard way and are not usually discussed very much. Dictionaries of gestures do exist, but they are rarely consulted. Consequently, even explicit gestures may be interpreted by the person receiving them in a way rather different to that expected by the sender.
This is much more likely if the two people involved are from different cultures. In that case, a specific gesture, such as nodding or shaking the head, may even have the opposite meaning to that intended! Alternatively, a gesture can be explicit in one culture and implicit in another. Therefore, an intended meaning might not be received; or a very specific, but unintended, meaning might, unfortunately, be assumed.
In general, it is therefore wise to use gestures with extra care whenever they will have to arrive across a cultural border. This is not entirely restricted to people from different countries or with a different primary language. It can also apply to different age groups, or different regions within the same country.